"Greenhilly" with Phil Hartman and Alec Baldwin 2 3
Greenhilly
Mr. Cherrywood.....Alec Baldwin
Julie.....Jan Hooks
Nora Dunn.....Wife
Maid.....Victoria Jackson
Harry......Phil Hartman
[ Julie and Mr. Cherrywood enter Greenhilly after playing a game of tennis ]
Julie: Oh, that was great fun, Mr. Cherrywood! We must do
it again sometime!
Mr. Cherrywood: If your idea of great fun is chasing a fuzzy little ball
over God's creation, then I pity you!
Julie: [ laughs ] You know, Mr. Cherrywood, I don't think you're half
as cranky as you would have ne believe. [ laughs, then notices a bird in the
room ] Oh! A bird has flown in! What do we do!
Mr. Cherrywood: We must try to scare it out the door!
Julie: Oh, alright..
Mr. Cherrywood: Here he comes! Here he comes!
[ they swat their racquets at the bird, causing him to dash back outdoors; they
quickly close the doors, laugh the incident off, then slowly gaze into one
another's eyes and fall into a passionate kiss ]
Julie: [ fights herself off Mr. Cherrywood's lips ] I must go. [ runs off
]
Mr. Cherrywood: But, Julie? JUlie!
Maid: [ enters room ] Your tea, Mr. Cherrywood. Where would you like it?
Mr. Cherrywood: Oh, over there is fine. Just put it anywhere..
Maid: [ drops the tray to the floor ] Oh, no! I'm so clumsy!
Why did I do that!
Mr. Cherrywood: [ bends down to help ] Oh, don't worry.. it's nothing!
Here, let me help you..
Maid: Oh, no, you musn't! It's my fault, not..
[ their eyes meet, and they fall into a passionate embrace until interrupted ]
Wife: Well.. isn't this a pretty sight.
Maid: Oh, Madam.. oh.. I was.. just bringing the gentleman his tea, and I
tripped.. and he was just being kind to me..
Wife: I can see that. You may go now.
Maid: Yes, Ma'am.. [ stumbles out of room ]
Wife: Mr. Cherrywood, I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to leave
Greenhilly.
Mr. Cherrywood: Leave Greenhilly? But why?
Wife: You're having a very disruptive effect on everyone in
the household.
Mr. Cherrywood: What are you talking about?
Wife: Why, even now there's lipstick all over your face.
hold still..
Mr. Cherrywood: Oh, now, don't bother..
[ she wipes the lipstick off of his face, but also falls prey to his charms,
ending in a passionate kiss with him ]
Harry: [ enters, angry ] Just as I thought!
Wife: Harry!! It's not what it seems!
Harry: Prepare to defend yourself, Mr. Cherrywood! If that's your
real name
Wife: [ runs off ] Oh, help! Someone, please help!
[ the two men exchange punches; Mr. Cherrywood strongholds Harry, who gives up
his struggle, looks into Mr. Cherrywood's eyes and locks himself in a passionate
embrace, then quickly breaks free ]
Harry: Well.. I'll be gonig now.. [ walks out ]
Mr. Cherrywood: But, Harry! Harry! [ spies a dog clawing at the window ]
Why, where did you come from? You're a happy little doggie, aren't you?
Let's just find out who you belong to. [ tugs dog's collar, as their eyes
fixate on one anothers, and they, too, fall into a passionate embrace ]
[ dissolve to title; fade to black ]
"Greenhilly" with Phil Hartman and Alec Baldwin 2 3
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